LT Clayton Heyward Asks Katy Perry Out

Here we go again, Navy personnel are back to asking celebrities out. Only this time it is a Navy LT, an F-18 pilot. Lieutenant Clayton Heyward is going to a Navy Ball, and he
needed a date. So he asked Katy Perry:

Navy Lieutenant Clayton Heyward (l), an F-18 pilot, posted a YouTube video asking Katy Perry out.

Good luck, El Tee brother. You’re gonna need it. Those blue-haired ladies are tough nuts.

Update: The Navy LT weighs in with this comment to the blog:

Hi, guys,

Sgt. Scott Moore credits his wingmen (comrades in arms) with getting him up to 4M hits on YouTube to get Mila Kunis to come to his ball.
I worked pretty hard to make mine entertaining. It’s gone international, but still only 25,000 views on YouTube.
Please enjoy, Like, and SHARE. If I win, we all win!

Ha ha, we all win! Thanks for commenting, Shipmate. . .

Stars Earn Stripes

Katy Perry in Stars Earn Stripes?

Earning your stripes, it is a phrase that encapsulates the military life. You work hard and are promoted accordingly. Coming soon is a television show with the same title:

“Stars Earn Stripes” is the working title of the show from veteran producers Dick Wolf (“Law & Order”) and Mark Burnett (“Survivor,” “The Voice”). Nine celebrities from music, sports and Hollywood will be paired with trainers at a “top-notch, secret training facility,” the producers said in a statement Thursday.

It could be fun or a monumentous train-wreck. Standby. Should be worth a chuckle.

Guess Who Is Joining the Marine Corps?

Katy Perry, Marine?

Jarheads, you have a new recruit within your midst. Meet Private Katy Perry. She is all set to go through boot camp. In fact, she has already cut her hair, worked out to get into shape, and talked with the recruiter:

Katy Perry’s metamorphosis into character is rapid and dramatic, starting with hacking all her hair off in a gas station bathroom and tossing it into the toilet. She then binds her chest, trades her sundress for an androgynous drab hoodie, and accepts a backpack and fatigues from a Marine recruiter.

And that’s where the real fun starts. Perry reportedly trained with boot-camp instructors to ready herself for the video, which stars a cast of real Marines and puts the singer through real military exercises.

A recruiter gave her some fatigues? The backpack I understand, but not the fatigues. No recruiter gives out uniform items. Except in a Katy Perry video for Part Of Me. . .

A Class on Katy Perry

Okay class, this is gong to be the easiest test you have ever had. All the questions can be answered with Katy Perry. The first question: Who is this?

Okay class, good. Pretty easy, right? That was indeed Katy. Now, who is this?

Any thoughts? Hard one, eh? Your guess, please. Kenny Powers? You mean this guy:

Nope. Not at all. Not even close. Check this one out. Love the chick perm(-esan) Katy!

Katy Perry got a serious makeunder for her upcoming guest role on FOX’s Raising Hope.

The recently single singer, 27, plays Rikki, a prison attendant who claims to be an old friend of Sabrina’s (Shannon Woodward). Sporting a bushy red wig and an unflattering uniform, Perry looks nothing like her super-sexy self. The episode, titled “Single White Female Role Model,” airs March 6.

Gee, I wonder why Rikki is single? Raising Hope, I have never even heard of this show. My guess: it is probably about the Air Force. They understand big hair. . .

Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, Nicki Minaj, Dolls

Check out this odd picture of Katy Perry at the Grammys:

Katy Perry at 2012 Grammys, performing Part of Me

Later, Russell Brand. Katy Perry’s performance of “Part of Me” was pretty much a slap in his face: “You chewed me and spit me out like I was poison in your mouth … This is the part of me that you’re never going to ever take away from me.” All sung while in a cut out metallic bodysuit.

Because the picture was snapped with a backup singer behind her, Katy looks like a doll. With a weird neck that turns all the way to the side. Not to mention her blue hair. But she was not the only one who looked doll-like. Here is Lady Gaga with Paul McCartney:

Paul McCartney and Lady Gaga, Grammys

Lady Gaga didn’t walk the red carpet, but even in the crowd, her black, high fashion, funeral appropriate outfit stands out. Especially when she appears to be trying to nuzzle with Paul McCartney.

Who are these people, our freak pop stars?

Yikes, I am trying to publish this post and another one just popped:

Nicki Minaj arrives to the Grammy Awards with a Bishop?

Little Red Riding Hood, maybe? Why the Bishop?

Two Divorces

Hearts are aflutter in Hollywood and Europe. Two bi-continental marriages have been decommissioned. First up, Russell Brand and Katy Perry. The details:

Branding Russell Brand idiotically stupid for losing his Cali Gurl

British comedian and actor Russell Brand called it quits on his 14-month marriage to “Teenage Dream” singer Katy Perry on Friday, filing for divorce on the grounds of irreconcilable differences.

Brand, 36, star of the movie “Get Him to the Greek”, and U.S. pop star Perry, 27, met in 2008 and married on October, 2010 in a lavish wedding in India.

The irreverent, former drug addict and the perky Christian-raised singer of international hits like “California Gurls” and “Firework” seemed an unlikely match, but they quickly became one of the most high-profile couples in the entertainment industry.

Kidz, Katy Perry says: read the Mellow Jihadi twice a day!

In recent weeks however, celebrity media reported that their marriage was in trouble.

They spent the Christmas holidays apart, with Brand being photographed in England, and Perry spotted in Hawaii — both without their wedding rings.

“Sadly, Katy and I are ending our marriage. I’ll always adore her and I know we’ll remain friends,” Brand said.

Russell, you crazy idiot. You nevah gonna do bettah den ‘dat. Never.

Gone is your old nick-name Russell “the Love Muscle.” In is your new nick: Russell “Ima Nothin’ But Fussell and Hussell.”

Sinead O’Connor, drug counselor Barry Herridge

Next up to heartbreak city, with a betrothal lasting a whole 16 days, is crazywoman Sinead O’Connor and a drug counselor named Barry Herridge:

Sinead O’Connor has spoken about being handed Class A drugs after taking her new drug-counsellor husband on a marijuana hunt on their wedding night.

The Irish singer says her fourth marriage was in trouble from the start and the wild search on the mean streets of Las Vegas led to their eventual split 16 days later.

The 45-year-old insists she still loves Barry Herridge, 38, but says she ended their relationship on Christmas Eve because of the pain he was in.

Barry, brother, you are a drug counselor and you hook up with this train wreck. How the heck did that happen? You answered her blog entry? Oh noes:

Why is Sinead wearing this shirt after her little SNL episode?

She wrote in September that she was in ‘desperate need of a very sweet, sex-starved man,’ but specified that he ‘must be no younger than 44, must not be named Brian or Nigel, must be blind enough to think I’m gorgeous, has to be employed and he has to like his mother.’

Inundated with thousands of replies, Miss O’Connor selected just one man to go on a date with – her future husband.

Ach, too bad. My name is Brian Nigel NavyOne and I am blind, guess I am outsies. If not for that, I would be lining up (queuing up, in Brit-speak) at her door. What? You say that that garden will lie fallow:

The Nothing Compares 2 U singer says she will never marry again and may not even date anyone.

I’m crushed. . .

New York City Snow Storm Scatters Flakes on Wall Street

New York City in Winter: A Cold Lion

New York City weather can be nasty nasty. I know, I worked as a bike messenger through one tough winter.

Take Riverside Drive, 11th or 12th Avenue, any of those streets that hug the Hudson River. The wind is vicious down there, it simply whistles off the water. And there are few buildings to block it.

I learned my lesson the hard way. It was December and I was riding south, midtownish. A gust of wind tickled my side and then pushed. Me. A good ten feet diagonally. As if I was a wind-surfer.

I skidded across a long metal grating and down along the edge of a curbed sidewalk. Shaken, I got off my bike, my heart beating in my ears. Somehow, I locked up my steed and sat in the lobby of an unknown building. No one said anything to me. New York is funny like that.

So when I read this, I think- those Occupy Wall Street clowns (the 99%ers) are in for a rude awakening:

It’s a record!

New York City broke it’s top snow mark with 1.3 inches at 2:11 p.m., the National Weather Service told the Advance.

The old record was 0.8 inches and was set in 1925.

The Weather Service just upgraded its forecast and is now predicting that 8-9 inches of snow will fall here by the time the storm winds down overnight.

Russell Brand, obnoxious British clown

More than 11,690 customers are without power, half of them in the Tottenville (Staten Island) area, according to Con Edison’s Storm Central website.

“We have a new record already,” said meteorologist Joey Picca.”We knew the moisture would be there, but the switch-over was sooner.”

Earlier in the week, annoying comedian Russell Brand even stopped by for a look-see.

Mr. Brand is better known on the these shores as Mr. Katy Perry. (I wonder if he purchased any of those special Occupy Wall Street t-shirts?) He had this to say of the protestors:

“The sense of cohesion and civic duty in the square, which many call Liberty Square, its former title, was something I found appealing. Protesters took the time to educate me on the matters that had brought them to the square.”

The first flakes:

Occupy Wall Street Snow Storm, Zuccotti Park

The above picture is from the NY Post. My favorite quote from the article:

“I got my blanket, I got my sleeping bag and I got my girl,” said 25-year-old protestor Rene, who came from Occupy Miami to Occupy Wall Street, “so it’s not hard to stay warm.”

Somewhere, somehow, George Gershwin is turning in his grave. . .

Update: I received a nasty comment which I am not approving for publication, but rather posting partially here. I cut out the insulting sections of it, aimed at another commenter. Dissension I understand; heck it is patriotic, right? But I leave my blog for stretches of the day and I can’t police squabbles. The part I can post:

“Spoiled Brats” and “Entitlement” ≠ “Sleeping on City Concrete in Snow”

Personally, I am not in agreement. This is how I see it:

“Spoiled Brats” and “Entitlement” = “Snoozing in sleeping bags on mattress pads in tents, with bathrooms around the corner. Not to mention the donated food or the shady $500,000 in the evil bank. Or the lack of a job. And the demand of free student loans. Or whatever it is that this movement demands.”

Or, how about this:

“Spoiled Brats” and “Entitlement” ≠ “Al Anbar, Argonne, any battle the US military has fought. . .”

Update II: Ah, nothing like the OWS folks to bring out a little unity. I also received the below comment, again aimed at another commenter. As per usual, I will not approve it, but post it here for your guffawing pleasure:

Your ignorance is astounding.

Here is the funny thing, the above commenter was only on the site for two minutes before posting the above screed. (I happen to be on-line at the same time, thus the successful sleuthing.) Usually it takes me a full ten minutes to be able to determine someone is astoundingly ignorant. Perhaps this genius has special powers?