Chubbs, Big Irfan, or Irfan Naseer?

I’ve long felt that I coulda (shoulda) been a helluva horse jockey, but was unfairly discriminated against because of my height. I can relate to Chubbs or Big Irfan:

Chubbs, Big Irfan, or Irfan Naseer
Chubbs, Big Irfan, or Irfan Naseer

The ‘four lions*’ gang that planned the biggest terrorist atrocity the UK has faced in a generation was led by a 23-stone chemist deemed too fat to be a suicide bomber.

Nicknamed ‘Chubbs’ and ‘Big Irfan’ by his fellow plotters, it was Irfan Naseer’s bulky frame that helped him to work on his bomb-making skills while at training camps in Pakistan.

The 31-year-old was too overweight to go on physical training exercises, and admitted he was mixing chemicals rather than ‘running up and down the mountains with weapons’.

Naseer gained an A at A Level chemistry, and honed his skills during a four year pharmaceuticals course at Aston University in Birmingham, coming out with a 2:2 degree in 2003.

He barely worked afterwards and spent his time showing his fellow terrorists how to make a bomb out of sports injury treatments.

His fascination for science first began during experiments at school while studying for GCSE chemistry classes, when the teacher showed him how to distil chemicals with a Bunsen burner.

‘When I was doing my GCSEs, one of the teachers did an experiment where he had a Bunsen burner and he threw a chemical on to the fire’, he told the court.

*The other “lions” are named Irfan Khalid and Ashik Ali. Except there are only three of ’em.