Single seat Faraday Cage req’d

article-3084856-28C715BE00000578-878_636x382Chris Roberts, the founder of One World Labs, told an FBI agent earlier this year that he had deliberately hacked a plane’s in-flight entertainment system (IFE) while aboard the aircraft, a search warrant by the agency claims. He also alleged to have overwritten code on the plane’s Thrust Management Computer, allowing him to issue a climb command and make the plane swerve sideways, according to the affidavit.

Roberts was detained by the Federal Bureau of Investigation last month after he tweeted that he might hack into the onboard systems of the domestic United Airlines flight that he was traveling on. “He said that he successfully commanded the system he had accessed to issue the “CLB” or climb command,… He stated that he thereby caused one of the airplane engines to climb resulting in a sideways movement” FBI Affidavit.

Being a ‘boots on the ground’ sort of a chap – I have no idea whether this is just total blather – or whether there is merit in what has been stated. My instinct runs with total blather, and some free advertising for One World Labs…     Yours Aye.

High tech Vs ISIS cave dwellers

Boeing patent reveals plans for Star Trek-style FORCE FIELD: Device would protect vehicles and buildings from explosion shockwaves. A force field that can protect vehicles from the destructive blast-waves thrown out by explosions is being developed by aircraft manufacturer Boeing.boeing patentThe company has been granted a patent for a device that appears to work like the fictional shields seen in science fiction movies like Star Wars and Star Trek. The system works by using an ‘arc generator’ to rapidly heat the air in front of a shockwave creating a cloud of electrically charged gas. The ‘arc generator’ uses lasers, microwaves or electric current to ionise the air in front of the shockwave so it deflects & reflects energy from the explosion

This in addition to; The ARMOUR that can repel direct incoming fire: 
British military scientists have been working on a new type of armour designed to repel incoming fire from vehicles. The armour, developed by researchers at the Defence Science and Technology Laboratory (Dstl) would use pulses of electrical energy to defelct rockets, shrapnel and other ammunition that might damage a vehicle. Engineers behind the technology claim it is possible to incorporate supercapacitors into the body of a tank or armoured personnel carrier to turn it into a kind of giant battery.defence-science-and-technology-laboratory-dstl-testing-electric-armour-740x555

When incoming fire is detected, the energy stored in the supercapacitor can be rapidly dumped onto the metal plating on the outside of the vehicle, producing a strong electromagnetic field that creates a momentary forecfield capable of repelling incoming metal. If timed correctly, the scientists behind the technology say it could help to prevent rocket propelled grenades and shells that detonate on impact from reaching their target. (DSTL), testing electric armour on an armoured personnel carrier at one their test range facilities


Meanwhile in the ‘wannabe’ Caliphate: ISIS militants destroy ancient artefacts using dated technology… And there we have it – the writing is on the wall for ISIS to take heed, that is, unless they have already destroyed the wall. Their end is nigh – their destruction is overdue! Yours Aye.

Brand name-gullible-mindless-sheeple

True cost and sound quality of ‘Dre Beats’ headphones revealedNew York Yankees v Boston Red Sox* Headphone designers estimate cost of making fancy headset could be $14 * Cheapest Beats headphones cost $200 and price goes as high as $700  * Jimmy Iovine and Dr Dre created $3.2billion company in the mid-2000s * It was sold to Apple in May of 2014 and they are now company employees  * Deal included $2.6billion in cash and approximately $400million in stock.

YorkshireGlassStorageJar_1024x1024It may cost more to get your haircut than it does to make a pair of Dre Beats headphones. 

Unsurprisingly; during an audio test of 18 of the top-selling headphone brands TIME Magazine ranked Beats as the second-to-worst entry in terms of sound quality.  Brand name-gullible-mindless-sheeple…

Which leads me on to my money spinner: “Essence of Yorkshire!” Yorkshire glass storage jars – containing pure Yorkshire air – bottled at source on the Yorkshire Moors at midnight. Followed by a canine version; “Essence of Nipper” Dog breath bottled first thing in the morning after his ‘ease springs’ leg stretch.  £150 GBP / $221 USD. Yours Aye.

Hearing hands – video call centre

Muharrem Yazgan is a regular guy who suffers from hearing loss. Normally, communication with strangers is a challenge for him, but on this particular day he noticed something very different about his city. The touching stunt was set in motion by Muharrem’s sister, who helped Samsung and fellow residents pull it off, which allowed Muharrem to have one day without barriers…

Positive marketing by Samsung, but what they now offer is an incredible lifeline to a lot of people who are hearing impaired. You may well be surprised at how many recent armed forces veterans would benefit from a video call centre  – just to get through the daily grind of life. We should never take what we have for granted.   Yours Aye. 

Cell phone or Hell phone?

Constantly checking your mobile? Then you could be depressed, study claims.25CC0F8200000578-2958430-People_who_can_t_put_down_their_mobile_phones_illustrated_with_a-a-14_142426099126325CC0F9400000578-2958430-Scientists_from_Baylor_University_in_Waco_Texas_said_that_indivi-a-13_1424260985411

Scientists from Baylor University in Waco, Texas, said that individuals who relentlessly check their phone (stock images shown) may be trying to improve how they feel emotionally. Study found people attached to their phones are more prone to moodiness

My iPhone goes into my pocket first thing in the morning, and only sees daylight if it rings. The fewer the calls, the more content I become; I’m oozing contentment as I pixelate before you.       Yours Aye.

Driverless cars – Tosh & Nonsense.

07E1040C00000514-2943467-image-m-69_1423271064141Driverless cars get green light and you WON’T need a licence meaning they’ll be able to do the school run on their own.
* Women are expected to benefit most – almost a third don’t have a licence.
* Disabled, elderly and children are also likely to gain from driverless cars.
* Children could be put in ‘robocar’ at home and sent to school without adult.
* Ministers to announce trials on Wednesday following six-month study. Motorists will not need a licence to use driverless cars 

Not wishing to pee on anyone’s bonfire, but; I’ve been using driverless cars for years – they’re called ‘taxis!’ You just open the back door – take a deep breath – and burble something you hope sounds like your current address to the driver – then you promptly fall asleep. Simple!  Yours Aye.

Anonymous please note “Mellow Jihadi”

AnonymousHacker group Anonymous ‘declare war on Jihadist’s after Charlie Hebdo massacre by pledging to target terrorists on social media. Authorities targeting extremists may have found an unlikely ally in the group in the battle against terrorism after the activists released a video condemning the gun attack at the satirical magazine which left 12 people dead. 

In the clip, which was uploaded to the group’s Belgian YouTube account, a figure wearing the group’s Guy Fawkes mask and a hood says in French in an electronically distorted voice: ‘We are declaring war against you, the terrorists.’ lonerangeronsilver2

Anonymous ‘declare war on jihadists’ after Charlie Hebdo massacre

This will definitely send the Jihadist’s back to the medieval age! Anonymous; if this site happens to catch your eye – please note that this is the “Mellow Jihadi” blog…

‘Who was that masked man’ ~ ‘I guess we’ll never know?’     Yours Aye.

I may be ‘droning’ on slightly; however…

23CD591A00000578-2863405-With_the_actual_machinery_of_aeroplanes_strictly_tested_the_thre-a-56_1417874541831‘Cyber terrorism may replace the hijacker and bomber and become the weapon of choice': Advances in technology pose new threats to aeroplanes.
Cyber attacks and commercial drones pose a growing risk of commercial aeroplane crashes, a major insurer has said. 

23CD557800000578-2863405-As_well_as_taking_up_airspace_information_collected_by_drones_co-a-47_1417872993448Technical advances in aircraft design and navigation systems have reduced the chance of dying in a plane crash, but the reliance on computers poses new types of risks. ‘Cyber terrorism may replace the hijacker and bomber and become the weapon of choice on attacks against the aviation community’ German insurer Allianz said in a review of aviation safety, publicly expressing concerns that others insurers have discussed in private. ‘Cyber terrorism may replace the hijacker and bomber and become the weapon of choice’

Besides drones collecting confidential information; just one of the little blighter’s carrying a small device could easily bring down a commercial aircraft. Time enough to ban them methinks…?      Yours Aye.

Broadband speed to warp factor 10

The past several days have been some what of a nightmare. The kind of nightmare where the final assault through an enemy position depends upon speed and muscle memory, yet every step taken is in slow motion, as the ground turns to thick oozing black sticky treacle! Which is all down to my ‘Internet Service Provider’ (oxymoron) not providing the service as contracted. My ISP download speed has decreased each day, even though I pay through the nose for their best available technology. Living in the sticks comes with its own pro’s and con’s, which I readily accept; but having gotten used to a moderate speed – the slow down ‘to a virtual halt’ has taken its toll in more ways than one. Even after numerous calls to the dreaded land of broken pidgin English, it still remains as slow as Joe Biden’s learning curve…  Vice President Joe Biden ordering three beers…article-2518060-19D4C3BD00000578-283_634x460 Having called my ISP ‘help desk’ multiple times it would now appear that I have spoken to all of the siblings of the Singh, and the Gupta family, as well as their extended family members. It was whilst speaking to one of the Kapoor brood earlier today that I had to politely ask for someone who could speak English a little better, as I was really struggling to understand ‘Peter’ the tech advisor. My request must have hit a raw nerve as he lost his cool and sarcastically said “Do you speak Hindi?” To which I politely replied “Good Gawd man don’t be silly, I am English-born and bred, I don’t need to speak Hindi!”

I hate being cut off in mid sentence, I find it very rude, and totally unprofessional :-)article-1110664-0037521B0000044C-569_468x315

Hannah and Nipper have benefitted from the past weeks intermittent digital transfer as we have pounded the country lane more often than usual. It also keeps their claws filed down, and assists in tightening their paw muscles – something field walks tend to slacken off.arnold_schwarzenegger_53164 

It’s true that I have also benefitted from the additional exercise, especially through grinding my teeth in seething anger, which has left me with the strengthened jaw muscles of a young Arnie Schwarzenegger.

It was through the course of such a walk (after todays part conversation with ‘Peter’)  that I actually happened upon the reason of the faulty download speed. A mile from my humble abode I walked past the soles on a pair of boots protruding from a dense bush that were connected to a pair of trousered legs belonging to a British Telecom engineer – tinkering inside a steel cable cabinet. Who almost went into shock when Nipper sniffed his bottom just as I said “Hello mate!” Fortunately he was wearing a hard hat, as he whacked his head on the lip of the box…Broadband

Similar: A BT ‘Openreach’ engineer working on a roadside fibre broadband cabinet.

After chatting with the engineer it transpires that BT are now replacing the old system with a £2.5 billion super-fast fibre broadband programme – that includes my humble abode’s post coded area. Which places me within the ‘warp factor speed’ of the Enterprise class, and out of the ‘haste of a striking slug’ class. Such tinkering over the last several days on both systems appears to have created blockages within the whole system, and it took a blunt speaking Yorkshire engineer to explain and resolve it! I’ve grown fond of my super toned jaw line, and enjoyed the additional country lane walks, I now need to seek frustration elsewhere for it to continue…     Yours Aye.

And while British Telecom seeks to reduce its bills (vastly) by outsourcing its IT ‘help desk’ to India. It cuts no corners on spending within its UK-based call centres, from where it pushes its products hard onto the British consumer. The following clip drops the F bomb, quite often, and quite loud. It is not recommended for those little cherubs under the age of 18, or anyone who is easily offended: It is definitely Not Safe For Work, especially if you work in a convent, nursing home, anger management organisation, or any such institution. BT F bombThis is a genuine recorded phone call made by an agent from a UK-based British Telecom call centre to a fed up BT customer whose number is listed as Ex Directory; Listen to the very end of the clip to hear the agents request to his line manager…

How do I stop it!!!

Scientists test jet-pack to help soldiers run faster on the battlefield! Think of a jet-pack and you may imagine flying over a futuristic city, inspired by scenes in sci-fi films. But the technology could also be used to enable soldiers to run faster in war-zones in a matter of years. US engineers have created a working prototype that attaches to people’s backs and helps them to run a mile in a much shorter space of time – despite carrying the large metal pack.   So what happens when the ‘off’ button malfunctions?1410520591941_wps_16_image001_png

* Engineers from Arizona State University have created a working prototype jetpack that attaches to a soldier’s back and helps them run faster.
* The 4MM project’s aim is to enhance the speed and agility of the wearer of a jetpack so they can run a four-minute mile with ease.
* Inventors say their packs could help soldiers escape dangerous situations on the battlefield and potentially save their lives, giving them more energy.

Engineers develop a thruster to enable soldiers to run faster on the battlefield… 

Without even looking at my wall calendar I know for a fact we are nowhere near to April 1st 2015? A guaranteed face-plant without a doubt 😉 Utter bloody nonsense. Harrumph…      Yours Aye.

Keep Calm & Roll With It

Roll with the times: U.S. company takes the cardboard strengthening roll OUT of toilet paper for first time in a century in move to cut down on waste. 1409126948532_wps_1_Tubeless_toilet_roll_ScotIt has been almost 125 years since a cardboard tube was first inserted into a roll of toilet paper. But now engineers at an American company have decided to remove it and replace the tube with – nothing, in an attempt to cut down on waste. Kimberly-Clark Corp. says the simple step could eliminate a large chunk of 17 billion cardboard tubes thrown away each year – enough to fill the Empire State Building twice.

U.S. company takes the cardboard strengthening roll OUT of toilet paper roll…images I made my first pair of binoculars from two cardboard rolls as a 4-year-old. The end is nigh.               Yours Ayeroll with it

‘You gotta roll with it, you gotta take your time’ You Tube…  😉

‘Humin’ a new contacts and phone app

HuminHumin is a new contacts and phone app that captures all of your relationships and remembers them in the way that you naturally think…

As I have often stated in the past, “To a certain extent, I am a gadget man.” And while I doff my cap towards Sharon Standifird in the post below; I do think that there is far too much personal information being projected around the molecular airwaves that is open to abuse. Before long we will need an app that  acts as a ‘COMPLETE BLOCKER’ to protect ourselves. It follows that a variety of government listening ‘Agencies’ will see this as a threat, and selectively intercept a person’s every day life who purchases ‘COMPLETE BLOCKER’ Which is a fictitious app name invented purely for this post. No doubt I have already incurred the wrath of the afore-mentioned government listening ‘Agencies’ by typing ‘COMPLETE BLOCKER’ three times, and publishing this post for all to read.dewey-cheatem-and-howe A note from the Mellow Jihadi legal team ‘Dewey, Cheatem & Howe.’ (Which is also fictitious, and a figment of the ‘3 stooges’ writers mind.) ‘COMPLETE BLOCKER’ is not available on the market as it does not exist. However; the Mellow Jihadi blog will quote artistic licence and demand a 25 % fee from any individual, firm, company, or registered organisation, who use the words, or title COMPLETE BLOCKER on any product. Oh Bollock’s! Unintentionally I have typed out ‘COMPLETE BLOCKER’ six times…  You read it here first.  :-)    Yours Aye.

Call home or face the consequence

article-2727267-209954C200000578-765_634x500You don’t want to mess with Sharon Standifird of Houston, Texas. Fed up with her son’s failure to pick up the phone when she calls and his ability to never answer her texts, the discerning Houston mom decided, with the ways of modern technology, surely she could do something about it. ‘I literally just started researching how to develop an app,’ Standifird told CBS

article-2727267-20995D0B00000578-953_634x1115Once she started, Standifird didn’t stop, and after a few months of designing the application and then meeting with a developer, the result was IGNORE NO MORE The app allows Standifird to deactivate the phone belonging to her son, Bradley, after installing it onto his iPhone.

Bradley requires a password to reactive the phone, which only his mom has. He cannot call or text anyone but his mom when Ignore No More is activated. The phone will let him dial 911, (UK’s 999) but it won’t allow him access to the internet or games.article-2727267-20995D0100000578-255_634x1111

Sharon Standifird, of Texas, has successfully developed an app called Ignore No More, allowing parents to lock their child’s phone until they call back, and it’s yours for $1.99.

Perhaps the next step is to play a really awful tune (Beiber springs to mind!) that cannot be turned off until the phone is answered. B.Z. Sharon Standiford of Houston, Texas. I personally would just cancel the phone, or put an axe through it; tough love…      Yours Aye.