Category Archives: Celebrities

Lauryn Hill Gets Jailed, Pat Smith Gets Some

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Eight-time Grammy winning singer Lauryn Hill

Eight-time Grammy winning singer Lauryn Hill

I have long maintained that some of the more interesting parts to a news story are the reactions of the readers to the content. For example, pompous singing millionaire Lauryn Hill actually had the stones to say this:

‘I am a child of former slaves who had a system imposed on them,’ Hill said before U.S. Magistrate Madeline Cox Arleo. ‘I had an economic system imposed on me.’

It reeks of stupidity on so many levels, I won’t waste time debunking it. But I must share this reaction, from Nim in London:

Sorry love but your nothing special, as we’ll all slaves to a system which has been imposed on us

And when Pat Smith, who lost her son Sean Smith at Benghazi, spoke to Jake Tapper about Hillary Clinton, one of the commenters replied back with:

Don’t worry, when it hits the fan, the press won’t escape the wrath. There are many of us watching the corruption by these pressitutes.

Pressitutes, love it.

Who Said What to Whom?

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I got a wonderful little goatee — and it was red! I also got hyperpigmentation on my cheeks, Drew Barrymore revealed to In Touch Weekly.

I’d rather smoke crack than eat cheese from a tin, Gwyneth Paltrow told a British talk show.

He’ll try anything! He’s cool like that, says Chef Khristianne Uy of Charlie Sheen’s chef.

I was very surprised, Tony Moore, who knew CDR Michael P. Ward. And frankly, I was a little concerned for my reputation.

Man, I got that truck. I don’t do no playing, Eric Brown told authorities when confronted about the theft of President Obama’s teleprompter.

Spring Dekaney head coach Willie Amendola was mowed down by a runaway cart after his team beat Cibolo Steele at the Cowboys Stadium.

Spring Dekaney head coach Willie Amendola was mowed down by a runaway cart after his team beat Cibolo Steele at the Cowboys Stadium.

Citing great personal embarrassment, Spring Dekaney head coach Willie Amendola is now suing Cowboys Stadium LP for $1 million.

In her new book, My Foot is too Big For This Glass Slipper, Gabrielle Reece writes that to truly be feminine means being soft, receptive, and – look out, here it comes – submissive.

The woman later told sheriff’s detectives that rapist Utchey Cabane apologized and told her, she should learn from this situation.

Tianlang Guan was penalized … when he again exceeded the 40-second time limit by a considerable margin, the Masters said via a statement.

Gisele Bündchen Visits Navy Dentist, Loses Teeth

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Gisele Bündchen, at an Island getaway for a bikini photo shoot, had a dental issue. The only dentists available were Navy dentists. And you know what happened:

Gisele Bündchen visited a Navy Dentist and lost her teeth?

Gisele Bündchen lost her teeth at a Navy Dentist?

She looks like Kyra Sedgwick. And truthfully, no Navy dentists were involved in this debacle. As usual, a blogger was too blame. In this case, Actresses Without Teeth.

Bill O’Reilly, Maureen McPhilmy, and a Helluva Joke

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Maureen McPhilmy and Bill O'ReillyWhen I was stationed at Gitmo, Bill O’Reilly came down to visit us. There we were, sitting ’round the breakfast table, me macking my usual scrambled eggs and pineapple. (I went through dozens of pounds of just those two foods during that deployment.) As Bill walked by, I did a double-take in the galley. But I did not say anything. I don’t worship celebrity, despite poking at it here in the blog.

Beware, this story of Mr. O’Reilly and his ex-wife, Maureen McPhilmy, is on the sordid side. I had better tell a joke to lighten the mood:

Did you hear I was marrying an Irish girl?
Oh really?
No, O’Reilly!

Although, I suppose it would work better this way:

Did you hear that newsman is divorcing an Irish girl?
O’Reilly?
No, McPhilmy!

Hey, it was just Saint Paddy’s Day! I got official permission from the green one himself.

Brody Jenner Gets a Tattoo

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I am not entirely sure who Brody Jenner is. I assume he is the respected, prized progeny of one Bruce Jenner- former Olympic athlete, current Kardashian. Why exactly Brodes has his last name tattooed in gothic letters down his ribcage is beyond me. Perhaps he has a challenge in remembering who he is? Do I see a NavyOne tattoo in my future? Can I hyperlink it to this site?

Sharon Stone’s Nanny, Erlinda Elemen

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Sharon Stone's Nanny, Erlinda Elemen Bible

Sharon Stone’s Nanny, Erlinda Elemen’s Bible

Erlinda Elemen worked for Sharon Stone as a nanny. And the Filipina was ordered by the actress not to read the Bible in Stone’s home. Ah, such tolerance.

Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Mary Strobel ruled that Elemen’s lawyers had provided enough evidence to support her allegations of harassment, failure to prevent harassment, retaliation and wrongful termination.

Hugh John Mungo Grant and Tinglan Hong

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Mr. Hugh Grant is a father again; it is painted all over the news. This gossipy tidbit itself does not interest me at all, rather I am curious of the mother’s provenance. A lady (one presumes) named Tinglan Hong. Old Ting Ting (her college nick-nick, per the article) had already given birth to Tabitha Xaio Xi Grant and now Tab has a brother named Felix Chang Hong Grant. (No one has ventured to ask the happy couple if they would consider naming their offspring, Land. At least some acreage would then accompany the beaming baby. Land Grant, get it?) A picture of the happy (the mother more so than the other) couple:

Hugh Grant has second child with Tinglan Hong

Hugh Grant has second child with Tinglan Hong

But the point of this post is to share this nourishing fact: that Hugh Grant’s real name is Hugh John Mungo Grant. Mungo? What the. . .

Brad Pitt Rides an Ecosse Titanium Bike

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The next time Brad Pitt tries to lecture me (through some media forum) about ecology and being green and all that, please remind me to remind him that he rides an Ecosse Titanium Series XX bike, the most expensive motorcycle in the world. One made out of titanium. That costs more than a Lamborghini. So I just don’t want to hear the green bizness outta him. (Not that I begrudge him buying anything he wants.)

Liberty Ross Is Lying Low

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I really don’t know who Liberty Ross is, but I love it when someone says she is lying low, but sitting on the front row of some fashion show:

Liberty Ross divorces Rupert Sanders, Skyla Ross cool kid, Liberty Ross pics

Liberty Ross divorces Rupert Sanders

Liberty Ross says she’s still lying low after her very public split from her husband, director Rupert Sanders.

Sitting front row Saturday at Alexander Wang’s New York Fashion Week show, the model-actress said the key to moving forward is “keeping her head down” and “listening to her heart.”

Ross filed for divorce in January five months after news broke that Sanders had an affair with Kristen Stewart.

Sanders directed both Stewart and Ross in “Snow White and the Huntsman.”

Ross, who walked in Wang’s last runway show in September, said her top priority remains her children.

These days she’s taking her fashion cues from daughter Skyla, who’s already been bitten by the fashion bug.

“(She’s) the coolest chick I know,” said Ross.

Skyla Ross is prolly a kid (considering how young Liberty is) and Mom thinks she is cool?

Randy Quaid Denied!

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Randy Quaid denied

Randy Quaid denied

My shipmate, ol’ Randy Quaid has officially been denied the ability to maintain a permanent resident status in the great north, otherwise known as Canada. His argument was that there are various “star-whackers” who kill Hollywood actors:

U.S. actor Randy Quaid will have to deal with “Hollywood star-whackers.”

Canadian immigration officials have denied Quaid’s request for permanent resident status in Canada, a Canadian government official confirmed late Saturday, Jan. 26, according to a Jan. 27 USA Today report.

According to the paper, a Canadian government official speaking anonymously confirmed that Quaid’s request was denied, but that Quaid can appeal the decision to the federal court.

Come on home, Randy!

Both Hospitalized for Health Reasons

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Two stars are in the news due to hospitalization. Neither is particularly newsworthy, but certain facts about each surprised me. Burt Reynolds is in the ICU for flu-like symptoms. And the article revealed that he once was part of the Gunsmoke cast. Really? News to me. The British singer Morrissey was also hospitalized, due to a stomach ailment. His singing is grating, but according to this blurb, he has a song titled: Irish Blood, English Heart. Hmm, is that saying what I think it is? I wonder if he had the nerve to put that tune out during the troubles. . .

Leonardo DiCaprio the Environmentalist

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Django Unchained and Titanic star Leonardo DiCaprioThose of you with your ear to the media-stone have already seen this gem.

But in the off-off chance that you haven’t heard of it: I am a bit drained. I’m now going to take a long, long break. I’ve done three films in two years and I’m just worn out. I would like to improve the world a bit. I will fly around the world doing good for the environment, added Django Unchained and Titanic star Leonardo DiCaprio.

Ah, Leo is here to save us. Flying around the world in his Learjet saving the environment. Of course, surely he can see the irony in his statement?