Navy Recruiting with Wickets

I am standing at the edge of the pier chatting with a Navy Chief. We are waiting for a late Warrant Officer before we go aboard a DDG.

You miss your last job? I ask the Chief.

Recruiting? Hell no. If I got home at seven o’clock it was an early night for me, sir.

How is it going recruiting linguists these days?

Good. They get bonuses and all that. But the thing that makes it rough are the wickets.


The Navy sets goals and it is not enough that you find one recruit a month to join the Navy. I wasn’t looking for a Nuke MM, I had to find a Nuke that was a Hispanic female scoring so high on the ASVAB. And preferably one that was young. Those are the wickets.

Where did you find the recruits?

When I got hard up, I went to fast food places. And the mall, I looked for the dissatisfied kids and went over and talked to them. I don’t want the white males, they don’t help with my wickets.

Wow, Chief.

And I was recruiting in Kansas. The Navy wants its Sailors to fit racial precentages. And we used that in recruiting. At least, that was what I was told.

12 thoughts on “Navy Recruiting with Wickets

  1. “Cold, poverty, and a life of danger and fatigue fortify the strength and courage of barbarians. In every age they have oppressed the polite and peaceful nations of China, India, and Persia, who neglected, and still neglect, to counterbalance these natural powers by the resources of military art. The warlike states of antiquity, Greece, Macedonia, and Rome, educated a race of soldiers: exercised their bodies, disciplined their courage, multiplied their forces by regular evolutions, and converted the iron which they possessed into strong and serviceable weapons. But this superiority insensibly declined with their laws and manners.”

    “It was scarcely possible that the eyes of contemporaries should discover in the public felicity the latent causes of decay and corruption. This long peace, and the uniform government of the Romans, introduced a slow and secret poison into the vitals of the empire. The minds of men were gradually reduced to the same level, the fire of genius was extinguished, and even the military spirit evaporated. The natives of Europe were brave and robust. Spain, Gaul, Britain, and Illyricum, supplied the legions with excellent soldiers, and constituted the real strength of the monarchy. Their personal valour remained, but they no longer possessed that public courage which is nourished by the love of independence, the sense of national honour, the presence of danger, and the habit of command.” Edward Gibbon, The History of the Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire.

    • Absolutely love this quote. I know I have read parts of his book, I forget if I ever finished it. A great work. . .

  2. I heard that fresh air, free thinking and whistling is about to be taxed?

    Yours Aye.

      • Free thinking has been under a termination order with (and by) extreme prejudice since the introduction of political correctness. The greatest trick the Communists ever pulled was to convince Americans that they didn’t exist.

        • In my book it is not over. Our culture is not lost. Little wins here and there. And you are right, your statement rings of that movie “Usual Suspects” and Keyser Soze.

          • Damned right, Lieutenant!

            “I am hurt, but I am not slain;
            I’ll lay me down and bleed a while,
            And then I’ll rise and fight again.” — The Ballad of Sir Andrew Barton

            Until I am slain.

          • Yeah, you two…until they lay us under and all the others of us who know what America’s all about….we never give up, ever….k

  3. Pingback: Joining the World’s Finest Navy© |

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